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Post by hayden on Jun 12, 2011 13:39:50 GMT -6
 ,SHE’D FORGOTTEN WHAT valkyrie, california was like. the scars the coastal city had left on her body were faded, a mark forgotten. it was foreign. the streets were no longer familiar, the sand no long welcoming. she had forgotten what sound the waves made when they crashed against the cold rocks. she didn’t remember the sun being this hot, the breeze being this chilled. the rumbling of the busses sounded echoed, a faint whisper. nothing was familiar. she couldn’t believe that was once considered “home”. if it ever was that. she had given valkyrie almost three years of her life. what should have been a fresh start ripped open her flesh, and watching with satisfaction as her blood poured onto the pavement. they were maroon stains now. but before, the streets and sand soaked into the fresh wounds from new jersey. infected them. the crashing waves sent in salt, but all it did was sting. the sun fried her scabs, the breeze peeled them off. and the roar of the public transit smiled with gratifaction. i guess she had done her best to forget what valkyrie, california was like.
it was an odd feeling, walking the pathways of this place. her skin had eventually healed, callused into rough shields. but time settled on them, creating more wounds. she had to sandpaper them down until they were flat against her body. wait for them to fade. it was like wandering the pages of a dusted book, yellowed with time. any memories had been written in pencil, but they smudged into something better off forgotten. but you spend a few stormy evenings attempting to translate the words, feel the emotion all over again. it becomes too painful after awhile. and then you just flip through the pages, salty tears falling to the parchment. you just absorb what you felt when you wrote this in the first place. that’s what being back here felt like. she didn’t quite know how to explain it, she didn’t even try. it is what it is. the scars were healed, but they still polluted her skin. but that’s what they were, faded scars. smudged memories. yellowed pages. none of it was fresh anymore. she looked at valkyrie with a new set of eyes, somewhere between nostalgic and grim understanding. it was different here now.
she was letting his curved beak gnaw on her ear. he didn’t realize what was going on. he was just ruffled, uncomfortable with this new heat. all he worried about was adapting to this environment. maybe he noticed the uncolored heaviness settling upon this broken city. but she didn’t really know. she didn’t really pay attention. her attention was elsewhere, observing what had once been her worst nightmare. it was funny. this fresh start had set off a chain reaction that hayden hadley could only describe as fucked in its fucking fuckface. she’d hated it here. but the fresh start was stale now. she’d changed her name, changed her face. she had changed everything. she was hayden valenica talbot, and she was calmly exploring what had once been a shining star. her hands were in her pockets, a faint smile on her face. she had a sizeable bird sitting on her shoulder, paying no particular attention to its surroundings. people were looking at her, like they always had when she’d been a hadley and a hundred miles away. but i think it’s because she had a bird sitting on her shoulder. it was different now. a few may recognize her, but they had no ugly words to say. it was because there was an unconcerned feather fellow chewing on her ear.
some of it was still familiar. the way this unbusy street turned into a pathway that eventually lead to the beach. she had spent many hours here. it was a good midpoint, between reality and fantasy. between her flaming hatred and her neutrality. the sands were most familiar. she had spent the better part of her time in valkyrie here, partying in the waves with the people who don’t care who you are or where you come from. her battle wounds were slaughtered across the rest of the city. but she didn’t pay attention to those, tried not to remember them. some of her surroundings had been etched into her memory. that was how she knew where she was going, to the place she felt most balanced. the point between battle wounds and unforgettable parties. ”it’s different here, la fleur. you would have liked it before.” her voice was quiet, almost a whisper. no one was listening. all she did was walk out onto the jagged rocks and look out to the steel-colored waves. she raised her hand, allowing her companion to chew on her finger.
she pulled her bag from her shoulder, letting it fall to the damp ground. her half-filled travel mug went beside it. she kept her ipod in her pocket, dirty headphones draped around her shoulders. her unorthodox quantity of bracelets jingled as she reached up and pushed her bright red sunglasses into her hair. her felt different being here. the noise from the pier washed over her silence, echoes in the air. there was laughter on the beach, girly squeals and booming grins. but it was quiet here, suspended between one world to the next. take your pick of which you’d like to be a part of. she was fine with staying here, in the grey area. the white noise. ”he really liked it here, too. no one busted him for drinking and smoking. i think it was to get away from me, because i never bothered to look here.” she was talking again, throwing words to the light wind. her companion couldn’t talk, but she liked to think he was listening. she didn’t have anyone else. it was like having wilson the volleyball, your own version of company. but human interaction was something she was beginning to miss. playing on the same level as someone else. valkyrie, california had not been kind to her in terms of humanity. but it was a different city now, one she didn’t quite recognize. time changed people, she hoped.
[/size][/blockquote] ----------------------------------------------------------- TAGGED, haaaylex.
DATE, february, 2012. the jetties.
LENGTH, 1051 words.
ATTIRE, clicketh.
NOTES, damn, i've missed them.
CREDITS, format and graphics to me.
lyrics to bruce springsteen - "streets of philadelphia"
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Post by alexandra leslie suresh on Jun 29, 2011 5:49:52 GMT -6
 alexandra,- - - - -
IT was common knowledge that there was nothing worse than a blank paper for a student or a writer. it was no surprise then that alexandra suresh was currently in a very frustrated state of mind. she'd been staring at this blank piece of writing paper for over an hour now and all that she'd ended up accomplishing was drawing a picture of three dogs that vaguely resembled the yippy pests two doors down. "ughhh. i give up." the twenty-one year old brunette finally flung her blue pen with the end slightly chewed across the room and listened to it hit the wall with a ting before falling onto the carpeted floor of her bedroom. alexandra sat in silence for a moment, leaning against the light green wall. she'd been sitting on the floor for approximately two hours she estimated and had accomplished nothing. while she'd originally intended to start writing that essay that was due soon for that stupid course she was trudging through at valkyrie university. however that had been abandoned fairly quickly once she realised she had absolutely no motivation. so instead alex had attempted to write a new song. but alas no such luck there either.
the problem was, once again, motivation. or rather inspiration to be precise. alex really couldn't think of anything to write about these days. there had been a time when she had been just spurting out songs like a math teacher throwing out math equations. she barely had to think about it, the songs had just come naturally. but that was a few years ago when the young brunette had turned to music and song-writing to escape reality. it had become almost therapeutic for her. alex couldn't even begin to count how many songs she'd written with underlying messages about her father, or about the feelings of complete emptiness she still struggled with even today. or those friendships that had just fallen apart as her walls slowly rebuilt themselves after taking so long to crumble down. alex certainly had her own issues. but most of those issues were settled comfortably in the past now. alex no longer went to sleep terrified that she could wake up in a completely different location and she was finally able to talk to other people without fretting about what to say. she'd finally moved on. the post-traumatic stress disorder was still present several years on and there would probably always be hints of it for the rest of alex's life since she couldn't physically make the memories and feelings from that period of her life disappear but at least she was able to go to sleep at night, even if that meant the inspiration for her songs wasn't as powerful anymore. she had to take the good with the bad. and the good definitely out-weighed the bad by a long shot. there would be more experiences that would evoke more songs as time went on, that was for sure.
right now however, it was quite obvious that there weren't going to be any new lyrics written down by alexandra today. so she stood up, stretching up and cringing as she felt a small shot of pain burst up her legs after being cramped up for so long. tugging on her headscarf that had fallen loose on her brown curls, alex surveyed the room as if waiting for a flash of inspiration. but the messy room offered no solutions. this didn't seem to dishearten the twenty-one year old. instead she shrugged her shoulders, grabbed her painfully empty notebook and retrieved the pen from across the bedroom before heading out the door. after all, maybe she needed to get out of the house and get some inspiration from the world outside of her house. several minutes later alex was breathing in the fresh valkyrie air. however there was something in the air that wasn't quite right. maybe it was the tang of tragedy that the entire city was still dealing with. despite the fact that alex may have been over her own issues now, it seemed that it was impossible to be content in valkyrie. no, the earthquake had stolen that right from them. instead alex walked down the street and tried to ignore the broken glass still present on the ground screaming out at her like the people that had been hit by each shard. it would take a long time and a lot of money to ever get valkyrie back where it had once been. but alex knew it would eventually. after all she'd written herself off as a lost cause and she had pulled through eventually.
still, the taste of the earthquake and the screams and the chaos was bitter on alex's tongue so she veered away from the most impacted area and headed for the beach where she ended up standing in the fish and chips shop. a few dollars later alex continued her walk, trying to awkwardly hold her notebook as well as the small box of chips without dropping anything which proved to be almost as challenging as her song-writing. still she managed to somehow hold both and chewed away slowly, savouring the saltiness on her tongue. the beach was always a very calm place to be, in alex's opinion. it was relaxing and the sound of the waves crashing against the sand soothed alex's frustration. still it was quite crowded, a little too crowded for the brunette's liking. thus she ended up along the jetties. a place she often avoided since it was usually full of sickeningly lovey-dovey couples. but it looked fairly empty today. it wasn't completely empty though. as alex quietly strolled up, she spotted someone standing near the rocks with a bird on their shoulder. as alex allowed herself to step closer, something about the stranger's body reminded alex of someone. a someone she hadn't thought about or let herself think about properly for a long time. "can't be." alex whispered under her breath. but it had to be. there was no one else quite like her so it couldn't be anyone else.
alex halted now. hayden hadn't noticed her, of course she hadn't. alex was still frozen at the other end of the jetty, unsure of what to do. half of her wanted to turn and run away and the other half wanted to just run. for some reason unknown to alex, the latter part of her fought the inner battle and she found herself tip-toeing over to hayden, almost testing herself to see how long she could go unnoticed. finally alex stepped forward so that she was directly next to hayden. “oceans, staring, lost love. It’s like a book.” she quipped with a hint of a smile on her lips, her southern georgia accent present once more due to her recent return to hinesville. to be honest she was amazed that she still recalled the first words hayden had ever said to her but then again it was hard to forget her first encounter with the quirky documentary-maker. that girl certainly knew how to make an impression. offering the chips to hayden in another symbol of their first meeting which felt like a whole lifetime and a half ago, alex waited. this was probably a huge mistake given that the pair hadn't spoken in oh, five years? but if she didn't do it now she'd regret it. damn, that would have been the perfect theme for a new song. oh well, it was too late now. here she was, standing. waiting. hoping.
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TAGGED TO; haylex <3
TIME/PLACE; feburary 2012 / valkyrie jetties
CREDITS; my format. asia's graphics <3
OUTFIT; herre. and the headscarf tied quite loosely around her head.
NOTES; that came out easier than i imagined xD yay finally some haylex <333 and i hope it wasn't too lame lol.
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Post by hayden on Jun 30, 2011 2:48:58 GMT -6
,THIS WOULD BE one of her new "spots". that had been decided the moment her aqua eyes had fallen upon the stone shards of glass. in the same way the old brewery's parking lot was. and that one spot on the side street beside bare nightclub. the haphazard parking spot with a rusted sign, tread marks and a few droplets of oil. when she lived here, she hated these places. her nightmares often took shape there, sharp-toothed figures finding comfort in the unnatural ugliness. that's what her dreams were, damaged memories figuring out her spiteful hate. they chose they places because they knew they were her least favorite in a town that scorned. all three. but i suppose you could call it serendipity now. here she was, after all, wordlessly declaring this suspended place as her new "spot"; her new place of bittersweet comfort. had you asked her years before, she would have spit her forked tongue at you, acid slipping from her fangs. and yet, here she stood. what had once been dallas james hadley's comfort now belonged to her, hayden valencia talbot.
that's why she had anathematized her current surroundings. everywhere he decided to pollute with his presence had once made hayden curl her lip. she hated her brother. it was no lie, no rumor. every citizen of valkyrie, california had known that. he had hated her, his little sister, too. the hadley siblings fed the blizzard between them until the day they were separated. i guess that's why she called this serendipity. hayden hadn't cared for her brother until that phone call. they hadn't spoken in over a year. the blizzard had calmed into a chilled winter storm. and that was the way it should have been. she felt ghastly, pathetic, because she had come crawling back to valkyrie, destroyed because she hadn't been able to apologize. we all known she never would have had her irritating brother been here. yet...she was here, absorbing any hadley pollution that might be lingering. her thoughts were clouded with his laugh, faded pictures of the smirk she had once detested. she cursed this place, that parking lot, the parking spot. she didn't quite know what she was supposed to be feeling.
her stomach churned because she was now facing the reality that she no longer had a brother to hate. i think they both enjoyed it, braving that blizzard with no gloves. it was because there had been two on that mountain, always there for the battle. even when it calmed, both hadley siblings were present in some frame of mind. she'd always known that. perhaps forgotten, pretended to have moved on, but it was always lingering. but now all that mountain with a winter storm had was her, kicking through the snow looking for footprints. the rage didn't flame in her belly anymore. it felt empty, much like the burnt fire she had once used to stay longer. he was no longer there to defend his territory. so she'd braved his fanged memory and passed the barrier. the hate lingered here, just like her side. that's what brought her to his favorite spots in this town. she was exploring what had once been his. because the war had been neutralized (she couldn't win by default. he would hate that.), she was always deserted fields of bloodshed. it was different here, now. she was claiming these places as her own because she didn't want anyone else to have them. their battles had been fought, and he found solice here. no one else should be able to escape reality here.
nothing good came of it. i guess serendipity was a little one-sided. she just felt empty. i suppose that was the "good" of it. her flame had been extinguished, her venom withdrawn. hayden was simply walking the battleground of a war long forgotten; a war collecting dust in a chest, at the back of her valkyrie history. she was declaring this hers because she didn't want anyone else to have it. she wanted to pretend her brother was still here, smoking and looking unimpressed. remember how she felt hollow? pathetic? he wasn't here to say anything, so she was free to steam by herself. she felt ridiculous because she felt terrible. she didn't deserve to feel anything. but, well, she had long learned to follow the path her emotions chose to take. mentality remained balanced that way, able to battle any venom-spitting memories that decided to come play. the "good" may have stemmed from something. but she still wasn't sure what she was supposed to be feeling.
her mind had long fogged, pulling her from her own reality. fleury was preoccupied with the ocean spray, gripping her shoulder tightly in objection. but she wasn't pay attention. hayden talbot was walking the plains of despair. she hadn't allowed much time to think of her brother. but everytime she marked one of his old places as her own, he came out to taunt her. and then she spun into a web of thought. you've heard them, clearly. cobalt eyes simply continued to stare, finding distant shapes in the cruel waves. they were dark, taking the from of something ugly. blurred around the edges, struggling to find their way to her. the longer she concentrated, the easier the shaded thoughts leaked from her mind. it was her subconcious, i think. realizing its body was suspended between worlds and patching up the flaying wound, healing the edges. i guess pulling these thoughts would make her feel better. she had no doubt. hayden was a remarkably healthy person, mentally speaking. she never lingered on anything unless it was on her mind. the second the sleazy smile of dj hadley had disappeared, she would be fine. no tears stained the rocks today. fleury was still chirping crankily when the last of the dark shapes faded, and her vision cleared.
she never knew how it happened, pulling herself away from her dark place. she chose not to think about it. it took a few minutes of letting go, allowing her subconcious to assert authority and she went on her way. no use not following your subconcious' rules. it could change your mind easily.
the vague smile appeared on her face before she managed to catch up to the situation. despite stepping back onto the stone of reality, dj still loitered at the back of her mind. this place would always do that. but she was fine, really. a genuinely decent mood. the emptiness had become comfortably numb. it'd been following her for her entire life. you don't let that run your life, friend. “oceans, staring, lost love. it’s like a book.” her companion extended his wings, feather mohawk unfolding, in surprise. silly bird had been so focused on his own misery he hadn't been looking at his surroundings. see? fleury and hayden were startingly similar. raising her hand to allow him to gnaw her finger again, she turned to face alex. alexandra leslie suresh. best friend, subject of torture, enemy, then just friend. the tension of their junior year had never quite healed. but it was surprising she hadn't spoken to alex in just over five years. every student at valkyrie academy had known of their tight bond, despite the nastiness. "i don't know. love and books? we could make it one hell of a tragic flick." her smile turned to a grin as she overlooked alex. she looked good, brighter than high school. her facebook hadn't been depressive, at least. reaching for a french fry, hayden shifted to completely face her old friend. holding it in her mouth, echoing the annoying way dj always had an unlit cigarette there, she reached to touch alex's headscarf. "you're all about the nostalgia today. you been stalking me?" she winked, the laughter only a recent addition to her voice. i guess they were both brighter now.
[/size][/blockquote] ----------------------------------------------------------- TAGGED, haaaylex.
DATE, february, 2012. the jetties.
LENGTH, 1318 words.
ATTIRE, clicketh.
NOTES, <333 epicness personified.
CREDITS, format and graphics to me.
lyrics to bruce springsteen - "streets of philadelphia"
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Post by alexandra leslie suresh on Jul 9, 2011 2:26:29 GMT -6
alexandra,- - - - -
IT was funny how attatched alexandra had become to valkyrie. especially considering she'd hated the city when she was younger. to the poor and bitter child she'd been back in the time when she'd only come here for summer vacations, this place was like torture, reminding her of everything she didn't and would probably never had. there were rich people everywhere and if you weren't rich you at least lived near the beach and you still lived a decent life. it was like some sort of weird heaven but at the same time it was just depressing to alex who knew as much fun as she had, she'd eventually have to go home to her alcoholic father and workaholic mother. it had been a nice escape and a chance for her to forget everything but then it always ended. eventually alex decided it was too depressing for her young mind to cope with and simply refused to visit her extended family up in california. she'd rather have put up with the torture at home than be given a chance to ignore it only to be tossed back into her georgian house again with nothing but a quick hug from her aunt. it seemed almost ironic now to think that valkyrie had ended up being the first place she chose to run to after leaving home at just fifteen years of age. but granted she'd only chosen it because she knew tim had come here.
god tim loved this place. alex remembered complaining about anything negative for the first month after she moved in, refusing to settle in properly and accept this as her new home. it was too good to be true and alex was still waiting for the dream to end. but she had allowed herself to accept the dream as reality. until that had all backfired on her and she ended up kidnapped by her own father. it just goes to show that you could never truly run from your past. it wasn't something that could just be deleted. things happened and they often stayed with you for a long time and as much as you wished you could just erase the memory, as of right now technology still didn't allow that. but there came a point, whether it was due to just time or maybe maturity, when people were able to accept the past. for example the drama that had gone down with the brunette standing next to her. alex would probably never forget the pain she'd felt as she read that stupid blog post hayden had posted, clearly aimed at herself. but she understood that hayden had been angry and alex accepted that she hadn't acted right. she really should have talked to hayden and amber instead of crawling into her shell. but old habits are hard to kick.
alex was doing her best though. she wasn't so secretive anymore, or so she hoped. she still kept a lot of her past regarding her childhood and her father to herself, figuring that no one really needed to hear that. but she was facing those battles as they came. she'd even headed home, home being in hinesville georgia where this had all began and had a good talk to a lot of her old friends. they were all quite bitter at first and rightly so. she had disappeared without a goodbye and hadn't even bothered to keep in touch. alex couldn't believe her younger self's actions at times but she knew that at that point she'd honestly believed that communicating with anyone from georgia would just result in her parents hearing about it and her whole long journey to california would be wasted. but those wounds were given a chance to heal finally. alex had almost considered staying in georgia for a while there. after all her mother was there and her eldest brother jackson didn't live too far away. sure there were some bitter memories but there were some perfect memories too. but it hadn't been enough. valkyrie had tethered itself to her heart somehow and it wasn't long until she ended up back where she knew she belonged. at least for now.
seeing hayden did bring up a lot of bitter memories, speaking of those. but they were a different sort of bitter. the pain was a different kind of pain. rather than the feeling of hatred and confusion, as alex tried to comprehend why her father could treat her as he had, this bitterness was for both hayden and herself. bitter at hayden for the things she'd done of course because alex still couldn't see her actions as innocent. but also annoyance at herself. the pain was more a grieving pain for the wasted weeks and months, and now years she supposed, when they could have been such good friends but instead had barely spoken to each other until they weren't even speaking at all. but the bitterness did fade quickly as alex stood calmly next to her old friend. instead she just felt an odd sense of longing. she missed their friendship. there was no one else quite like hayden although that was probably a good thing. alex doubted the world could handle more than one hayden. alex moved her focus to the bird sitting comfortably on hayden's shoulder. so she had a pet bird now? alex wasn't even surprised to be honest. giving hayden a slightly wider smile, she allowed herself to be looked over by hayden, grabbing another french fry and chewing on it as she continued to eye the bird. it seemed quite harmless so after another moment, she moved her eyes back to hayden just as the latter reached for her headscarf.
"you're all about the nostalgia today. you been stalking me?" alex looked down at her headscarf, the ends sitting lightly on her shoulders. she hadn't even realised. letting out a giggle, alex felt her body relax. she hadn't even been aware of how tense she'd been but seeing an old friend-turned enemy did that to you she supposed. "i didn't even plan that. i'm serious." she said, holding a hand up in defense. "no stalking. i'm going to call it fate or something." she shrugged, tugging another french fry out of the box and taking a bite. "so hey. long time no see." she said, her voice light as she attempted to keep the conversation equally light, as though there wasn't a big pink elephant in the room. or rather on the pier. after all they hadn't exactly ended things on a high note. but alex no longer held a grude against hayden. hayden's feelings towards her however were relatively unknown to alex. but here they were, conversing and sharing french fries. that had to be a good sign.
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TAGGED TO; haylex! <3
TIME/PLACE; feburary 2012 / valkyrie jetties
CREDITS; my format. asia's graphics <3
OUTFIT; herre. and the headscarf tied quite loosely around her head.
NOTES; bleugh late and lame. but done :]
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Post by hayden on Jul 18, 2011 23:59:31 GMT -6
,THREE YEARS SHOULD not have been a long time. she was twenty-one, and she had eighteen other years to credit. so why did those thirty six lone months leave the most evidence? everytime she, hayden talbot, looked in the mirror, she saw valkyrie, california flickering in her eyes, a dim, weakened lightning. a three year thunder storm that continued to pollute the sky; dark clouds lingering, never quite expired. her memories of this town, eminently, were black. a cheerless flashback. their pointed fangs slithered her mind, marking their territories with everything that had happened. they knew the truth. she caught flashes of their silohouettes sometimes, when the lightning was particularly provocative. maybe it was because in those thirty six months, hayden had allowed these fanged visitors in. invited them to stay, have a drink or two. maybe we'll be friends. being alone together, hurting, when we need it most. it was comforting. in new jersey, she didn't have her shadowy friends. her mind would let her forget, erase those years into a mere homage of terror. three years is not a long time. she had many others to offer, free to foxtrot through fields of roses. but when you have satanic companies, untouchable associations, they bring a magnifying glass to play with. it should not have been a long time. but her mind chose to hold those months to light, taunt with her forked tongues and acid smiles.
they knew the truth. they brought the material to play with.
she had been born in princeton, new jersey. the fifteen years after that date were not her fault. the universe selected that her dna be brought together and develop into ross and julia hadley's second child. it was malacious, but that's how it was. she was raised in an unusual environment, more toxic than most. in a different way, hayden was poisoned. they fed her lies, slapped her cheek with the dusty bible when she wanted to know the truth. she hadn't known any better. she was born a different breed, a different shape. her body would not fit, despite their most impetuous efforts. she scarred and callused. time piled, awaiting the time to force her from that mold. it took fifteen years, but her body eventually escaped. the cold air of reality hovered over her unusual markings, cuts that no one could really understand. the only one who could is gone now. dead. the only evidence is a broken body that her shadows choose to play with sometimes. but all of that was different. hayden knew she would never quite come to terms with her upbringing. but she had fixed it. that cold air slipped through the window late at night and whispered harsh truths to her. there was a solution and a trip to home depot threaded the pieces together. a needle was all anyone needed to find the seam and rip the stitches. princeton, new jersey did not hold her truths.
the forked tongues and acid smiles had collections. they did not care about her fifteen years. when she stumbled into valkyrie, they sensed her weakness. no one was inviting them in to be friends. they just wanted to be loved, after all. but hayden was a new sort of victim. she didn't know anything. this was a frail girl cemented to the side of a tired boy, a terrible knowledge haunting his eyes. all she wanted was to be loved. when valkyrie, too, chose to callus her sensitive flesh, hayden invited them in. anything for company. they nestled into her dark, unstable world and developed a clique, just for them. no one else allowed. when her brother began to distance himself, their rift deepened. there was no one else. he mocked her. her classmates mocked her. her authority did nothing. valkyrie, california saw hayden samantha hadley as vulnerable and sunk their fangs into her. all she had were those forked tongues and acid smiles. that was all that, essentially, remained loyal for her entire three years.
it was them who made thirty six months that long. it was them who had those collections. it was them who knew her truths. it was them that continued to stalk her, deciding to remind her every so often.
collections. what collections?
people trapped in adolenscence are knavish, malignant. hayden chose to bare her fangs and spew her venom. her playmates took notes, observed for awhile. in the beginning, she was unfamiliar. cautious of this new role she was cast. she didn't understand why she was signaled, different than the rest. she did not fit in. this mold valkyrie offered her was awkward, something she could not accept. when the realization came to pass, the venom bled from her sharpened molars. it made sense. this part to play, it came naturally. hayden was deemed an outsider quickly. no one bothered to look at the freaky weird girl until her poison infected them. that's where those collections came from. her friends taught her, rewarded her with expertise. it was the things she did with this odd power that they remembered, cemented into history. she was knavish too, malignant and cruel. at least she knew it. everyone around her pretended to be absolute, buffed to classic brilliance. she took it upon herself to remind them that no, they were not invincible. they were broken skeletons, out to attend the masquerade of life. these so-called collections were not what they pretended, they were what she did to them.
everytime she thought about it, hayden had to look at her hands. blink a few times, remember how much blood should be stained there. her old playmates sometimes displayed the people she dragged through acid, how she ruined so many of them. their reputations. everything that mattered to their closed minds. once she was comfortable as a corrosive, she turned professional. when she set up her soon-to-be infamous blog, the grey rainbow, people stopped ignoring the freaky weird girl. they paid attention to her, the lone outsider with the audacity to spit at them without a mask. it had been fun at the time, relieving. they were feeling just as empty as she was. she finally had the company her heart craved all this time, eager to pour the misery into empty soup bowls. they licked at it hungrily because she wanted them to. some people loved her effortless influence. some continued to call her names. but most of them curled their lips, knife tongues excitedly responding. not that it mattered. nothing they could do could touch her. she was already protected, a thin shield developed against her skin. it was the loneliness that came with it. she hurt people, made them feel as pathetic as she felt herself. but it was her playmates that continued to remind her, show her intricate sketches of what she was doing to people. that just made her do it more.
her isolation made it a very long three years.
the curled lips and knife tongues lurked in the shadows of valkyrie. hayden valencia talbot was different now, a mere revenant of her darkest self. but the memories were there. like her scars. time healed, but did not cover. nothing was ever completely gone, destroyed. her return alerted everything she had dealt with long ago. her dark place would always be there, and she accepted that. but...it was still there. the familiarity of where her longest years were made it difficult. the ghost of dj made it even harder. but she had to face it. the presence of alexandra suresh flooded her eyes with memories. more broken than whole. their history was complicated, a feeble survival of the fires they had lit. she was the one who sprayed gasoline onto it at first, set her acid right onto alex. she had ruined anything that could have been. her playmates made no mistake in reminding her. looking at her face for the first time in five years was laboring. all she could see was the hurt in her eyes as one blog entry after another was thrown to the world, tearing at her name. everyone knew. the grey rainbow had been one of the most infamous blogs on the internet at the time. people all over knew just how pissed off this alex suresh had made hayden. she swallowed the knife tongues and managed a smile. this was becoming more difficult the longer she was here.
but she didn't have to try. not now. hayden talbot was a sufficently better human being. while the scars were there, perhaps surfacing with aged bruises at the hardship of being back in valkyrie, there was no pretending. her words were genuine. her smile was real. but so were the bitter memories that surrounded these almost strangers. "fate isn't this clever. you were stalking me." amusement lacing her words, her eyes shining as she teased alex, hayden reached for a second fry, holding it up for fleury to nibble on. "i would've worn that dumb scarf my brother got me. send me a note next time." grinning again, hayden easily lowered herself to the ground. leaning back on her hands, she looked up at alex. "hi yourself. it's been a long time. how have you been?" her words were slower now, cautious of the subject other than the weather. forked tongues and acid smiles had ruined what they once shared. even she didn't know if time could heal that completely.
[/size][/blockquote] ----------------------------------------------------------- TAGGED, haaaylex.
DATE, february, 2012. the jetties.
LENGTH, 1576 words.
ATTIRE, clicketh.
NOTES, what a mess.
CREDITS, format and graphics to me.
lyrics to bruce springsteen - "streets of philadelphia"
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